fairjennet: Text only. "In the beginning, there was nothing, which exploded." (Default)
I thought it was about time to write something here, since I really haven't made an entry worth blinking at since March. This one probably won't be worth any vigorous eyelid movements either, but what the hey.

Let's see. Bad stuff first. Work is crappy, just like usual. There's lots of emotional roller-coaster drama and not nearly enough money. It probably seems harder because the fair season starts next month, and that makes freedom look awfully attractive compared to my whining grandmother. It's just that time of year, I guess. Spring, itchy feet, sap rising...homelessness.... Gypsy, what?

We'll be missing almost all of the fairs this year. That isn't such a big deal for me; I'm happy with the dreams in my head no matter what what our lifestyle is like, but I feel really bad for Larry and the kiddo. Larry's not a bad house husband, don't get me wrong. Still. Organizing home is my forte, not his, and he's wasting his potential being tied to the house away from people. And oh boy, the kiddo needs friends the way my houseplants need water. There are no kids for him here. None. Every time we go to the park, he has to make friends all over again. Sometimes I think I was mad to think we could live in a stable place like normal people. We're not normal at all.

What else...I have a few fandom-type things going on online. These days I'm playing a Wraeththu rp game with an original character. Shadow is all new and shiny, and he says things like, "Fuck conformity," and "Oh good, I'd hate to think you'd let just anybody cut your throat," as easily as I would say, "Please pass the butter," so that's fun. Also, I started playing Aredhel at Dreaming Spires again. I love that game even though the format isn't good for my poor psyche. I tend to edit obsessively when the roleplaying isn't done via IM, since I actually have a choice about when to hit the reply button. Oh well, I suppose all that heavy editing is good for my writing skills.

Here's a secret: after re-reading my posts over there, I've decided that I actually know how to write. It's not as good as I want it to be, but it isn't awful. I can really do it if I try hard enough. For real...um. I think.

Speaking of writing, I'm doing it again. Constantly, relentlessly writing, that's what I'm doing--both inside of fandom and out of it. I don't know why I do this to myself, not really. Trying to write something besides the usual rp and journal stuff always makes me feel like I'm hovering on the edge of a nervous breakdown. I want to write, oh, with the same results as giving birth...a miracle come from love and dreams, through pain and fear, striving at the very edge of my endurance. Pretty silly, huh? Yeah. I've got the drama queen part down pat, all right. Now all I need is the miracle.

*sigh* I meant this post to be cheerful. Oooh, I know. I read some really awesome books this month. Cassie Clare's latest book didn't suck. Finder by Emma Bull made me fall in love with Bordertown all over again, even if it did make me weep. Elsewhere by Will Shetterly is quite possibly the best book I've read all year. I'm such a sucker for troubled adolescent boys. And speaking of troubled adolescent boys...I swear, every time I re-read Swordspoint I discover something new. This time I obsessed about Michael Godwin in between squeeing over the parts I'd forgotten about Alec; there's all sorts of interesting things going on there that I'd never noticed before. Ellen Kushner is a genius.

And that is all.
fairjennet: Text only. "In the beginning, there was nothing, which exploded." (yellow butterfly)
It was a supremely ordinary day today, but a rather nice one. It was full of mom things. I cleaned the house, went to Wal-Mart for groceries, praised crayon drawings, raced the kiddo to the mailbox, and even took him to Target to buy a toy. The trip to the toy aisle reminded me so much of what it was like to be a little kid. I remember bargaining future chores for toy money just like the kiddo did today, and I remember my own mom sighing and saying, "Are you sure you really want this toy? Are you sure you don't want to save your money until you can get something better? It's a whole month of taking out the trash with no allowance..." I felt so much like her when I repeated that little speech. I don't remember my mom very well, so I just love those flashes of memory.

This evening, I cooked dinner and wrote lesson plans. I discovered the best activities over at the BBC school website. This one fits in perfectly with the unit on ancient India in the kiddo's history book. The whole BBC school site is amazing. All I can say is that the Brits must have a better educational system altogether. These activities are designed to fit in with their national curriculum, and the little snippets of curriculum standards they include make me want to download the whole "Key Stages" document. It makes so much more sense than the "Texas Essential Knowledge and Skills." Apparently, Texans are supposed to be essentially confused.

Anyway, we're having fun with his Social Studies/Language Arts stuff. This week was Robin Hood, reviewing European geography, and introducing encyclopedia use. (Funny how much more he liked King Arthur, the little snob! :D )Next week is reading Ananzi stories, writing poems, and a review of African geography. After that we get to do ancient India, more geography review, and then tigers with the encyclopedia. Then on to ancient Greece!

Homeschooling has always been exhausting, and I'm starting to realize how unprepared I am to be a teacher. Sure, I can teach the stuff--it's not rocket science--but I find myself wishing I had studied early childhood education. There must be some sort of secret to making sure everything is taught the way it's supposed to be taught. I don't want to teach him the way I was taught in public school; I want him to be interested. Yet, I also know that we need to cover a bunch of stuff that isn't very interesting--at least it isn't very interesting to me. I'm trying really hard to get Larry to take over the math and science. He actually gets excited about it, and I'm just sitting there saying, "Are you done with your worksheet yet?" *hee* Maybe we should just move to England and stick the kiddo in a public school.
fairjennet: Text only. "In the beginning, there was nothing, which exploded." (starfingers)
It's been so long since I've been able to get online for more than a few minutes. I think I need a bit of a ramble here--behind a cut because coherency seems to be even more unattainable than usual.
ramble, ramble )
Speaking of time off, if any of you elf playing types are around later, I'm totally up for a chat. My elves are getting snarky since they're always cooped up in my head and never get out to play anymore.

Love and stuff,
fairjennet: Text only. "In the beginning, there was nothing, which exploded." (yay!)
I have an apartment.
How utterly freakin cool is that?

Home again

Oct. 15th, 2007 08:16 pm
fairjennet: Text only. "In the beginning, there was nothing, which exploded." (i'm with the band)
Yay! Finally back in Texas again. Flat tires, running out of money, and giant rainstorms didn't stop us! We're now living in our camper behind the TX renfest. Very, very happy to be home.

Stuffins is all good--kiddo's in school 3 days a week, lotsa fun people live nearby, and I once again have an actual social life. *gasp* A social life that includes waaay to many gorgeous men for my sanity, but what am I gonna do, complain? (Apparently have also lost the ability to type a complete sentence, what's up with that?)

Anyway, you should all come here, immediately, because this place rocks like a big hair band from the eighties. Okay, so maybe not JUST like a big hair band--but there's lots of long hair and music and drums and funny clothes and elephants. Elephants! You don't know what you're missing.

(No, I'm not drunk, despite my incoherent rambling. Really, I'm not. Yet. :P )

Eeep! I missed the b-days of two very awesome people, so...b-day girls click here )
fairjennet: Text only. "In the beginning, there was nothing, which exploded." (the road goes ever on)
As usual, we're running late and low on funds; but the Michigan renfair starts next weekend, and we have to be there. We leave tomorrow evening. I just hope we can make it there by Friday.

I'm feeling a bit Frodo-ish about being on the road this year. You know how he changes Bilbo's road song to say "weary" feet instead of "eager" feet? I've got weary feet. Living on the road no longer about adventure for me.

Part of this is because we won't have the camper with us this time, and because we still don't know where we're staying once we get there. The largest part, I think, is that this isn't a "there and back again" adventure. We're always in between places. Despite all my efforts to change things, we've been living out of boxes and bags for almost 9 years now. I'm ready to go home.

As soon as I get one, I'm going there like a shot.

Perhaps I'll feel better once we get to Michigan. It will be nice to see friends again and to have some kiddo free time. If we do well enough, we may even buy a new camper with running water, a refrigerator, a stove that works, and maybe even a separate bed for Larry and me. I think that would be home-like enough to make me happy.

I don't know, I think I'm just gloomy cause I'm still getting over a cold. That's probably it.

Anyway, not sure about internet access, but it should be easier this year with the laptop. I'll try to make a post or two here, and I'll definitely be checking my email about once or twice a week. Otherwise, I'll see you guys in October. :)


fairjennet: Text only. "In the beginning, there was nothing, which exploded." (Default)

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