Stuff

Yes, I'm being extremely neurotic yet again. I finally worked up the courage to friend ellen_kushner, but then I chickened out on writing the obligatory comment to tell her that I did so. Hero worship gives me bad manners. *sigh* I worry too much over nothing.

It's like the time I had to write a paper on fairy tales back in college. I found this message board online, and posted a question about which books I ought to read for research. Two people called "Terri" and "Midori" recommended some excellent books and asked me what my paper was about. I answered, and something I said sparked a discussion between the two of them. I spent a delightful couple of weeks messaging back and forth, contributing to the discussion whenever I felt able, thinking about it whenever I was away from the computer, and generally feeling the first academic excitement I'd ever experienced in my life.

Then somebody mentioned Midori's new book.

I'd never heard of Midori Snyder, so even though I was impressed, it didn't turn me into a gibbering fangirl idiot. But then somebody mentioned Terri's last name. I realized I'd been chatting easily for weeks with Terri Windling. Yes, THAT Terri Windling, the artist and editor whose name adorned the inside cover of almost every one of my favorite books. I used to look at her cover art for hours at a time. And Bordertown; I'd just discovered Bordertown a couple of months before. Terri Windling!

I know, I know, authors and artists are just people. So what? They're people with better brains, and I can't talk to them without second guessing my every word. So silly. I finished my paper, thanked them both politely, and never posted anything on that messageboard again.

Ah, hero worship. At least I got an A on that paper. And hey, now I get to read Ellen Kushner's lj entries on my friends page. Convenient, that.

In other news, I just drank a huge gulp of ant-flavored Dr. Pepper. It didn't taste too awful--unpleasantly tangy, but not horrible enough to be worth getting up to open another can. The little nuisances would probably crawl into that one, too.

I’m starting to scare myself. In the past two months I’ve been more disaster prone than a main character in a YA romance. So far I have…
( ...done a whole bunch of stupid things. )
What next? Geez, I'm almost afraid to leave the house.

Okay, so yeah, I'm a pretty lenient parent. I want my kid to grow up to be independent, the kind of adult that takes responsibility for his own actions--not some sheltered guy that totally loses all control at the first sign of freedom. And so I let him pick out his own clothes, brush his own hair (inexpertly), get really dirty, and play outside with his friends without me hovering over his shoulder. He's six. I don't think this is unreasonable.

Apparently, I'm in the minority here. Did you know he was playing outside yesterday? You let him wear that? Really!? Aren't you afraid he'll get sick from playing in the rain? You let him ride his bike WITHOUT A HELMET!?! OMG! he's MUCH too young to be by himself even for a second.


I'm starting to get scared. Is someone going to report me for letting my kid be a kid?

Last year some friends of mine got in trouble with Child Protective Services. I won't go into the whole complex situation here; it involves adoption and a really unorthodox family situation. But here's the main thing: the parents weren't reported because of some kind of abuse. It was because the kids were allowed to go barefoot, their hair was messy, and their clothes were all muddy. Some neighbor saw them walking down the sidewalk with their teenage brother, and she called CPS with a story about suspected neglect.

Now these are the coolest parents I know, and their kids are amazing. These are the kids who taught my kiddo to share when I was ready to beat my head against the wall in frustration. The older ones (10-13 yrs.) come by to chat with me and we end up talking about ancient Rome or WWI or gender roles among teenagers. They're the most well-adjusted kids I've ever met. They're not hungry, they're not cold, they're healthy. Yet, my friends were found guilty of neglect, because the kids were playing outside without an adult. In a suburban neighborhood.

Today, my neighbor came to tell me that the kiddo was riding his bike in the street. I told her thank you, but he was allowed to ride his bike since he knows to watch for cars. I also informed her that he may be small, but he's actually the same age as the other kids riding in the street. She just gave me a LOOK.

So now I'm worried.